The sound made her turn around and observe their short lived journey along the marble steps, as they were dragged by the soft gash of wind.
The wind stopped and so did the leaves. They were next disturbed by the rest of the guests arriving and walking up the steps. Well dressed people moving around in a choreographed pattern, acknowledging each other with a nod or a slight tilt of the head, proceeding on to the next encounter.
-If I am well, I can then be present for the people around me. He said. She did not reply. She could see this conversation overcasting her reason for being there. Her immediate thought is how convenient this train of though is. What a simple idea! Is he suggesting leaving the group? Removing himself to re-discover himself? Or is he suggesting simply continuing tapping into the group resources without considering the greater needs. Funny, is it not? A major breach of the spirit of teamwork yet a well accepted attitude. Is it a “get out of jail card” or a matter of priorities?
One of the guests recognised her, and the salutation ritual began. She was happy to see him but was trying to keep her thoughts going in parallel.
-Let me introduce you to some of the others! He said. All three of them walked away, he led her towards the steps, she hesitated walking up for just a moment. She did not want to disturb the leaves. He assumed she might need a hand as she was wearing heels and he offered his arm for assistance. That is a chivalrous gesture; she thought, wrapped her hand around her friend’s arm and walked up the steps speedily, paradoxingly leading the way with him in toe.
Mindfully she included him in all the introductions, whilst wondering what is the actual point of going through these motions. The event concluded quickly. She stepped out and took in the view from the top of the steps. The wind had re-arranged the leaves.
She gave herself the deadline to formulate a reply by the time she walked down the steps.
-I see that you thought it through. I see that you feel cornered by life. He did not react and she opted out of the conversation once again. The ideal situation would be for him to enjoy the familiarity and warmth of the group and still have his needs on the forefront. Yes, of course that is the ideal situation, on the other side of the seesaw is everyone else. All of us that are balancing squeezed on the other side.
The guests, congregated where the drinks were laid out. The wind picked up again, the leaves started to dance.
The wind stopped and she could feel the devastating loneliness of the warm sunrays.
'the sound made her turn around' (2017)
'cornered by life' (2017)
'devastating loneliness of the warm sunrays' (2017)